pepe's faith

Grandma took Pepe for the night, so that Chris and i could go see Tom Petty (yeah, felt 20 and 60 at the same time, I think Chris felt more like 70 - what does "Beat the Lakers" has to do with Tom Petty?). Chris and I had our family meeting (do I love those, they make me feel so organized) and Pepe was one of the topics. It's time to think and plan potty training, big boy bed, regular grooming, giving up the baba. The big boy bed will be set up in 2 weeks when Chris finishes school. Will start introducing the potty next week. We'll switch to pull ups in 2 weeks. And the baba...i am not really worried about that.

We also decided to dress Pepe in his crib, rather than have him walking around in his pjs - it gets to be tough to dress him later. He also needs to get used to combing his hair and other necessary grooming (like today's future haircut, yikes!).

In terms of the potty, everyone uses potty treats and rewards. While I am a true behaviorist, I feel uneasy to reward for a behavior that outta have intrinsic motivation. But can you expect a less than 3 y old to have intrinsic motivation for anything that's not primarily id? No. So there will be digger stickers and rewards.

Chris thinks that school destroys a child's spirit by forcing them to follow others' schedule rather than their own. While I agree this is partially true, I believe in fitting in, moving and adjusting to the way the world changes and turns. Yes, perhaps writing letters is more romantic than emails, or cell phones, but the world is what is and one has to embrace it - the likes and dislikes. And there is always a balance if you seek it and choose to see it.

Done!

the trouble with the psychologist in the house

i diagnose everything. when something is off with people i meet i always wonder why. it just how i think. it is automatic. i do it with me, i do it with others, i do it with pepe.

luckily i don't have any experience assessing and treating children, and have only basic knowledge of childhood disorders and appropriate treatments. nonetheless, i still worry about pepe. i worried about autism when he was younger and he spent time alone playing. that passed. i worried about color blindness. that passed. more recently i think about oppositional defiant behavior, since pepe is so antagonistic, easily upset and irritable, has such difficulties with transitioning. but then i tell myself that other times he is so sweet and pleasant and polite and affectionate. like last night, when we were playing propel, and he hurt my stomach when propelling... he immediately started kissing me and hugging me and telling me that it is going to get better. and he never really tantrums for more than a couple of minutes, and gets it when i give him 2 choices, that i mean it.

i also think about ocd, when pepe "undoes" things, like if i help him open the door, he closes it and goes back and opens it again...and of course, this could be, like we said, pepe's independent stubborn spirit.

so when pepe's teachers asked me whether i'd like to talk to the schools psychologist about pepe's difficulties with transitions, i was very happy bc i can also bring up these concerns. working with patients with mental illness makes me very sensitive to these issues, very understanding and very protective.

of course will blog about it...

afternoon in the neighbor's yard

pixs

HOT summer day, 99 F, pepe wants to wath TV...naked.

PEPE's latest fun activity - driving the car. He slipps into the car seat - "Mommy I'll drive it, you sit in the car seat".

too hot to do anything...

and no nap for pepe or work for me. yikes!
what happened? i can only blame chris (isn't it nice to be able to blame someone) coz pepe slept in the car this mid morning, on their way back from toy's are us. i bet pepe was tired, coz he woke up before 6 this am, and everyone had to be up as well. so since 2pm i've had pepe and the heat. we can't go to the playground bc of the heat, the rez is not open yet (saturday, yeah!), and pepe is in his demanding mood. he wanted to go in the back yard, and we spent 1 h there, pepe naked. next, he wanted to go on the street, and of course i said not. tantrum followed. wanted oj, then spilled it. wanted cranberry juice then spilled it. not even tv gets his attention. i'll give it another hour and then take him somewhere with AC. Heat, heat go away, come again another day!

pepe and the fan

pepe loved the fan in our bedroom last year. the fan was his fascination, kept asking to put him on, it was exasperating. but this evening when i put the fan on, he started screaming
"no fan".
and later, when chris sat on the bed, below the fan, pepe started screaming again
"no daddy, it is dangerous, you can get hurt".

i say, like father, like son. chris also hates the fan - not bc it is dangerous, but still!

caring for luke 2

pepe slept in today, answer to my prayers. we hang around in the morning with bob the builder and books and coffee and baba. next a trip to the gym for me - wednesday i'll be back running:) and playground for pepe and chris. next, an attempt to feed pepe at home, unsuccessful, prompted a trip to the ice house (and a smile, coz both chris and i think about jim when we see the ice house) with mac and cheese and french fries for pepe and smiles to everyone around. everywhere we go, people talk to pepe. and if they don't, the friendliest sofio immediately starts a conversation (reminds me of dad, of course).

at home, there was time for nap, which became nap no nap. we did leave him in his crib for an hour. he kept asking for daddy and i convinced chris that he should not go, "i agree, coz if i'll go he will grab my face and won't let go until i get him out". i only went in after a series of noises - did pepe climb out of his crib? no, the books, babas, and trucks have been thrown off... i told pepe he has to sleep, read another book, put star on, and both chris and i took a nap with the door closed.

i got pepe out of his crib after an hour.
P: "i up, mommy".
AM "Did you sleep".
P: "No, no sleep, but I up now".

Chris took luke for a walk, i took pepe to the beach/playground. again, we had loads of fun. pepe talked to everyone who talked or did not talk to him. i noticed he has an easier time sharing with girls. maybe practice with helli and pilar.

back home. pepe slept in the car. chris and i planned our family meeting, since we did not get anything discussed during this trip - both of us preferred "the wire" and just sitting around.
at home, pepe had a major tantrum, did not want a bath, and screamed his lungs out. i really like how i handle these tantrums and i think my method works. i held pepe and told him he can watch tv after the bath. to no avail. next, i told him that he either takes a bath or goes to his crib. i had to repeat that a couple of times, but he got it. he first gave me a searching look, kinda asking"are you for real?", and then hopped into the bath.

after bath pepe was a changed boy. he asked for daddy and apologized for having slapped him.

hopefully a good night sleep. it's hot and humid here.